A culture of violence #1801
It's encroaching on time of year where everyone pretends to have a little Irish in them and that they actually really love Guinness: *dontchaknowthataboutme* really, LITERALLY, like I drink it all the time. This can be proven at the bar when ordering the next round in three phases of explicit braying noncery:
- critique of the pour - angle, speed, colouration (it's black)
- gratification that the rest-time is observed (based on knowledge gleaned from that black and white tick follows tock ad ~ correct timing or reasoning unknown)
- smack/sigh/exhale combo on taking the first sip to accentuate the satisfactorily acquired white frothy moustache, followed by a benign comment about this being the best Guinness in the area and the best you've tasted outside Dublin.
Didn't know you'd ever been to Dublin?
er, yeah, my Grandfather's actually from there.
Rinse repeat etc.
On Saturday we'll have some Guinness on draft but we have the wrong gas in the cellar for it so if anyone says it's the best we've either fluked it and created a beautiful accident or you're stuck with someone largely undesirable.
To up the Oirsh, Macca will be playing records; who isn't actually Irish but from Liverpool and that's as close as we could get.
If you wanna practice your accent try the following line ~ "I'll be fine with all this oil" ~ but say 'Oil' for 'I'll'. How useful this sentence will be in real life situations is largely unknown. You can thank us later. Actually, scrap that: use that line at the bar this week with you're best accent and we'll give you a free beer.
Equinox ~ 20th March
Next Tuesday we'll be launching our macaroon inspired new menu for Spring. It's the equinox which we think means that the day and night are the same length all around the world. To celebrate with the pagans we're putting out 6 new drinks, 3 new aperitifs, some light snacks and we'd love you to join us.
Book a table for Tuesday with the message MACAROON in the special requests box and we'll knock 50% off your bill*.
*You may be required to taste everything and then give lucid feedback.